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Drama Bomba Llama
Drama Bomba Llama is the fifth episode of the new Mack 10. It lampoons the constant drama of the wiki's users by using a parody of Age of Division as the main setting. Episode Senator Ron Paul, narrating in unnecessarily bolded text: "Long ago..." huge brown shit is shown, with bits of corn and carrots nearby being its moons. The camera zooms towards the giant shit. Senator Ron Paul, who we need to remind you is still narrating for some reason: "There was a huge majestic piece of shit called The Duwang Gang, blessed, built to be the Throne of the Finest Shitposts... camera pans across (across what? fuck you that's what), showing the entirety of the Duwang Gang Discord Server, stopping in to show two users standing on a white power symbol. Senator Ron Paul, who is still narrating in case you don't have any attentions span: "It was a great server, where everyone loved shitposting, and the shitposting belonged to everyo-" What the fuck are you doing? Senator Ron Paul, looking around for the source of this meta bullshit: "What do you mean? I'm simply narrating the wondrous story behind the origin of the Duwang Gang." ...It's a Discord Server whose only inhabitants are suicidal shitposters that was made because Omi had nothing better to do. Senator Ron Paul, trying to ignore how cringeworthy a dialogue like this is: "Yes, but I wanted to create a gritty, realistic war story based on it that has a deep and complicated lore that I'll never actually explain, but boy howdy will it be there!" Fucking why? Senator Ron Paul, who is running out of snarky descriptors for his name tags at this point: "...I'll get back to you on that." Okay, fucking...whatever. Do what you want, but I'm not bailing you out when it turns out to be shit. Senator Ron Paul, whose text is no longer bolded because what the hell was the point of that in the first place: "It won't be shit! Just because the majority of people working on the project are either dead, notorious for dropping their work, or both, doesn't mean you should expect this to turn out poorly!" Alright then. What's your plot? Senator Ron Paul: "...Our what?" You know, your plot? The thing that happens in your movie? Senator Ron Paul: "Uh..." Message from the Writers Hi guys, it's us, the writers of Drama Bomba Llama. Please read the following message before you start your engines. It occurred to us while we were writing the movie that we really had no idea what we were doing. We just kind of came up with a concept that sounded kind of cool and ran with it without thinking very hard about the plot or characters. So, instead of taking a step back and reworking the concept a bit to make it work, we decided to double, triple, and quadruple down, and strained ourselves so hard pushing out the fattest turd we could that we now have hemorrhoids and are in extreme pain just sitting down and writing this. Anyways, now the story is strange and contradictory to the theme of the movie, the plot is full of so many holes that Swiss Cheese is getting jealous, and the characters are so flat that cardboard cutouts are currently filing an identity theft claim against us, but we decided that we had waited long enough on releasing this thing and just gave it to the public as-is. We expect everyone to understand the poor quality of this presentation we've been hyping up for months and for this to not backfire in any way whatsoever. Please, enjoy the movie, even if it does make you want to bash your brains in with the nearest blunt object, and in case you liked it, please sign in for the arbitrary fan list. Moobie Yopo: "So, how about them ni-" Ulti: "Yopo no" Yopo shot Ulti a glare as the rest of the team behind them groaned in reaction to this exchange taking place for the fifth time this morning. Yopo: "What? I was just going to say "nice people". Is that so wrong?" Ulti: "No offense Yoponot, but since when do you complement people?" Yopo: (Gasps in mock offense) "Ulti, I am shocked and appalled that that is your opinion of me!" Mig: "Bro bro bro bro, bro bro bro bro!" Yopo: "See, Mig agrees with me!" Aaron: "You can understand him?" Yopo: "You mean you can't? What are you, racist?" Aaron: "Yeah sure why not." CaT: "Would you guys shut up? You're going to blow our cover!" Yopo: "Yes, our fantastic cover of being yelled at to shut up. Beautiful strategics, if I do say so myself." Yopo leaned back against a wall and yawned, covering his mouth with a middle finger directed at CaT. Yopo: "Anyways, I'm gonna get some shut-eye, and if our targets ever are stupid enough to come through here," (Gestures at the narrow ravine below the enclosed bridge the group is hiding out on) "just tell me to wake up and I probably won't kick you. Maybe." Aaron: "You're supposed to be the strike leader! You can't just go to sleep!" Yopo: "Then what do you call this?" With that, Yopo was out like a light, leaving Aaron staring at him open-mouthed. Aaron: "Christ, it takes me at least five sessions of jerking it to the queen before I can fall asleep that fast. How does he do it?" CaT: "Constant shitposting takes a lot out of you, especially when you're doing it on his level." Prime: "If he put that much effort into his romantic life he'd probably be married by now." CaT: "Memes before dreams, Prime. Memes before dreams."